5. How I justify my use
People have a natural tendency to justify everything they do, including when they are doing something undesirable, forbidden or illegal. When a person is doing something that they know is wrong or harmful to another person, they must in some way justify their actions to themselves for them to be able to carry out those actions.
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- Example 1
I am walking and come to a street crossing – the red light indicates for me to wait. There is very little traffic. I know I should wait for the green light. I tell myself: “there are no cars and no traffic, crossing the road even though the light is red is not as harmful as driving through a red light. If I go quickly there is no harm in it”. I decide to cross the road even though the light is still red. - Example 2
I am driving well over the speed limit even though I know what the limit is. I tell myself “this is a straight road, and the weather is great, and there are no speed cameras on this road, it doesn’t matter if I drive a little faster”.
It is said that people are extremely good at lying to themselves, and we find it very easy to justify our actions to ourselves. These justifying thoughts are known as cognitive distortions. Cognitive distortions represent your internal speech, or thoughts, by which you explain or defend your actions.
As you are aware on a rational level that you are breaking the social norms by using CSAM, you often convince yourself that your actions are acceptable or justified, so that you can comfortably break the social norms. Cognitive distortions allow you to avoid taking full responsibility for your actions while at the same time regulating the feelings of guilt and anxiety caused by the using CSAM.
Remember
The more you become aware of your cognitive distortions, the more able you become to replace them with different thoughts, which will then lead to different behavior.
Quotes
Below is a list of typical explanations and cognitive distortions that CSAM users tell themselves to justify their behavior to themselves and make it feel accepted and right.
